N-NO!! No, I...I-I didn't I...! It wasn't--...I-I beat it, Deku, I just--
It's something she's been avoiding saying, avoiding thinking about, because it's the truth Ochako wants to deny and pretend never happened. Why each time she says it, she corrects herself before finishing. But this time, someone else said it and she cant stop that. Can't stop how those words twist the knife into the raw skin and make it bleed anew. Ochako feels her breath catch, and she can't stop the little gasp.]
...I di-didn't...you--...a-and Ba-Ba-Bakugou-kun...I-- [Her breathing starts to come out fast, panicked.] B-Both of you, I...
[...]
I-I had to... I had to, and I... D-Deku-kun, I had to see it after. I didn't se Bakugou's but. B-But you...yours I...I-I had to see it d-d-die and-- [She hiccups, tears starting to spill from her eyes.] Everyone keeps t-telling me it's n-n-not real, i-it wasn't y-you or...o-or anyo-o-one else!! I know that! I KNOW THAT!! But I saw it...I saw your body...it said my name a-as it di-died...
A-And Bakugou's I just guessed! I just guessed, Deku. What if I k-k-killed him too?! No one gets how much it hurts!! Everyone keeps telling me to get over it, because I won. Because they're gone now and...and I'm so sick of it! Heroes don't kill...we're not supposed to...we aren't. S-Sensei alw-w-ways said... [She tapers off, throat closing up and Ochako just sniffles and coughs.]
no subject
N-NO!! No, I...I-I didn't I...! It wasn't--...I-I beat it, Deku, I just--
It's something she's been avoiding saying, avoiding thinking about, because it's the truth Ochako wants to deny and pretend never happened. Why each time she says it, she corrects herself before finishing. But this time, someone else said it and she cant stop that. Can't stop how those words twist the knife into the raw skin and make it bleed anew. Ochako feels her breath catch, and she can't stop the little gasp.]
...I di-didn't...you--...a-and Ba-Ba-Bakugou-kun...I-- [Her breathing starts to come out fast, panicked.] B-Both of you, I...
[...]
I-I had to... I had to, and I... D-Deku-kun, I had to see it after. I didn't se Bakugou's but. B-But you...yours I...I-I had to see it d-d-die and-- [She hiccups, tears starting to spill from her eyes.] Everyone keeps t-telling me it's n-n-not real, i-it wasn't y-you or...o-or anyo-o-one else!! I know that! I KNOW THAT!! But I saw it...I saw your body...it said my name a-as it di-died...
A-And Bakugou's I just guessed! I just guessed, Deku. What if I k-k-killed him too?! No one gets how much it hurts!! Everyone keeps telling me to get over it, because I won. Because they're gone now and...and I'm so sick of it! Heroes don't kill...we're not supposed to...we aren't. S-Sensei alw-w-ways said... [She tapers off, throat closing up and Ochako just sniffles and coughs.]