Hello, everyone!! I'm not here right now - probably in class or with my friends! Or on a mission. Um...leave me a message here and I'll get back to you soon, okay? Bye!!
as stupid as he is, bakugou-kun is RIGHT...in a way. we need to get more information abt the porter and what is rly is and how it functions.
i only rly said that if he needs me for anything to call on me...and knowing him, he'll try to shoulder the burden all on his own like an imbecile. but i won't throw myself, or him, into a situation that could get us killed, and i know kat i know bakugou-kun won't allow me to get hurt either.
No. What you two should do is leave it to people who aren't first year students, but you're not going to. He wouldn't tell me if you were involved, that's how I knew you were and yes he will get you hurt if he likes it or not.
Take it from someone who knows, no one can protect anyone. You can try and you can fail while trying to protect someone, or you can do or die and win.
[Ochako frowns at her phone, brows knit together, and has to take a deep breath, rubbing her eyes a little. Jeez...this isn't what she needed to deal with before bed tonight.]
ok that i do agree with, but bakugou won't wait. he's impatient and reckless...i'm sure even YOU know that. after everything he's been thru, i'm sure he's getting desperate too...and scared. he won't admit it, but i know him.
and tho u may disagree, shigaraki-san, i WILL keep katsuki safe. and everyone else. i thank u for ur concern...i do. but u already know what side i'd choose. if it puts ur mind at ease, i will try to talk him down as much as possible, or at least formulate some sort of ACTUAL plan.
I know he won't wait. I considered flipping sides and contacting—[[He... backspaces the name 'Shouta'. That was not what he meant to type.]]—your teachers, but what good are they if they don't already know?
Choose whatever you want. I'm not your dad. If he's already scared, he's already a liability. If you're trying to protect everyone, you'll be dead and protecting no one. It's not concern it's reality and that's why I'm here.
You need a plan and I've done this before. I gave him a list of what I need. If you deviate from the plan I'll make sure to arrest you both myself and we'll take care of it.
[Okay, that gets a very prolonged pause from Ochako. She knew her teachers knew about the League being here, but them working together? I mean...it's not impossible - they're adults, have more experience and are far better educated in dealing with this - but it seems so...so improbable. Considering all the shit the League has dealt them with, with Shigaraki at their driving force.
Ochako immediately bristles though, both at the insults thrown at her friend, and the jab at her pride. Yeah, maybe he's right - she can't save everyone, but she'd be damned if she doesn't try.
Her cute chat speech is gone, an actual frown on her face now as she plucks at the letters on her phone.]
You're free to think that, Shigaraki-san, but I'm going to disagree with you. Maybe not everyone, but I WILL save people, especially those I'm closest to. I'm still a hero, and that's been my goal for a while now. So, don't tell me what I can and can't do. I'll only try harder to prove you wrong.
[Isn't that what he wanted? For her to be better? Stronger? Well, here's her resolve to do just that.]
What's your plan? If you've already spoken with Bakugou and he disagreed, I'm sure there's a reason why...but I'll at least listen.
[Like she always does. Shigaraki is owed that much, but there's no guarantee even she'll agree with his plans either.]
My plan? It's to win. He doesn't want to do it my way and so since I contacted him to end this constant, boring fighting, I'm letting him get me the resources I need. If he can't, he knows I'll do it my way and on my own. That's how I help, that's the only way I help otherwise, we'll take care of it and actually get it done.
[Ochako rubs her temples. She is...so tired. Why does she have to deal with this? Why? Has she not had enough?? Is she not allowed to have a relaxing, peaceful month again? Nah, thought not.]
Right...wrong question. How do you intend to "win", Shigaraki-san? Because I'm pretty sure "your way" may be something not even I can agree with...no offense. But, if you're really willing to work together with us, then maybe we can strike some sort of compromise.
Or at least I can, and then try to beat some sense into Bakugou later.
Perfect score. You won't agree, you think what I do is akin to grotesque. I think he's on a losing pattern right now, he has no clue what the final boss is like. I'm doing this because a fight between us right now isn't a benefit to either side, even if my side would win.
I didn't message you to get you more deeply involved, I messaged you as a courtesy. Do what you want, when you want, with whoever you want.
Please don't put words in my mouth, Shigaraki-san, it's very rude. I haven't said a bad thing about you since we started talking, it's all been you assuming things for me. As well as CONTINUING to talk down about my friends in front of me, which I've asked you to stop doing.
Whatever happens, happens. I can't control it, neither can you. I said I'd talk to Bakugou and see if anything else can be done - a real plan - but that's all I can do. If this is ALL you wanted to tell me...
[Ochako's eyes narrow at her phone, unseen, but she stares icily at the screen. If he wants to engage in a particular topic of conversation now, or later, regarding the newest arrival...she'll indulge any time.]
I ran into Toga Himiko at the convention some time after I was with you.
Were you not aware she arrived, Shigaraki-san?
[Oh, she doubts that. The venue was relatively large, yes, but there was no way he wouldn't know. Shigaraki is too observant. And while she respects him, and well and truly enjoyed the time she spent with him there - it was actually a lot of fun, to spend time as two individuals without any titles or opposing sides and biases - this cannot be ignored.]
Yes. Why wouldn't I know which of my own comrades are here? I wasn't aware this acquaintance arrangement also came with a tell all clause. Did she do something to you?
[Not answering the first part, it's to be expected, and Ochako's not about to play with the "details" of their agreement - it's already shaky at best - but color her curious. What would he do? She honestly isn't so sure anymore.]
Remind her that our affiliation to Twice is going to make it difficult for him to live a happier life if she keeps it up. I can imagine so many of us here is already making it difficult for him.
I'm guessing she didn't do anything to hurt you. She likes you, you know.
[[That was a question without a question mark in it. She didn't tell him exactly and he needed to know.]]
But I'll be honest, Shigaraki-san, for as much as she "likes" me...I really can't stand that girl. And I don't mean to be rude, but it's the truth. So many things about her make me so upset, so angry, that I can't think straight. I ACT before I think and it's scary. I don't want to be the reason we have to fight one another sooner rather than later, so...
I wanted to tell you that.
[It's not a threat, and not even a warning, just Ochako being honest about how she feels. Because she actually likes being able to talk to Shigaraki like he's a person. She really and truly enjoys spending time with him when she doesn't have to worry about Heroes vs. Villains. When she can just be Uraraka Ochako - a 16 year old high school student.
But it's not always easy to not start a fight when someone keeps egging you on. Even absentmindedly.]
[[Good. He doesn't want to explain to Toga that she can't go after Ochako and why. Not with Dabi around. If they feel like he'd switched sides or flipped, it won't be easy to explain away. ...Not that he would try. It just made things easier.]]
I don't mean to be rude is the same as 'I'm not racist, but'. It means you're about to say something you think is rude. All of us aren't any different, Ochako-san. We're all the same person with different starts. Toga is someone I will defend like you would defend Bakugo who did actual damage to someone, just because I was a villain. Am a villain.
[Wow, Shigaraki doesn't pull any punches, and Ochako actually flinches at the text she reads, feeling her cheeks heat up in embarrassment and little shame. He's right, deep down, she was making excuse, trying to be polite to him, for his sake...when the reality of it is that she really and truly hates the fact that Toga "likes" her. Because to Ochako, that word has been totally and completely bastardized, and it makes her sick.
Which is why, after doing as instructed and dialing Shigaraki, she pretty much opens right with--]
[[There are zero punches pulled. Even more so where Ochako is concerned. He has no reason to not tell her how it is, because they've always been honest with each other at least.]]
I am right, but if you feel that way then don't apologize for it.
[[What is 'hello'? It's this.]]
I think out of all the heroes you actually have a chance at making a difference. Don't let that get to your head, you still do idiotic things. Asking you if you know why I'm saying this isn't going to get anywhere. Do you remember the little girl? The one I pointed out?
[For a moment, Ochako is really and truly startled by what he said, eyes wide and disbelieving. It steals all the words from her all at once, but she also feels...thankful. Really and truly thankful, because it validates that what she's doing means something. And that she's actually doing her job right.
'Don't let it get to your head' he says, but Ochako's already smiling at nothing, her features soft and eyes a little misty. How strange, that. Hearing a villain say she has a chance at making a difference feels like the biggest compliment she could get. Why?]
Mm... [Give her a second, Ochako is thinking, but also trying to right herself again after that shock.] Little gi--you mean the one I saw when we first talked? The one with the dog?
You didn't ask for a novel but you got one. Villain Monologue and of course locked.
[[Over voice he can't possibly know that she was misty eyed and really he probably wouldn't be able to deal with that. Crying women weren't his forte and after unlocking the imagery he had by remembering all the bad things about his childhood, all the more.
He meant what he said, she was an idiot sometimes, but he wasn't stupid either. Just like Bakugo he could see that she had potential.]]
That's her— them. She was Hana, Mon was the dog. I don't expect you to remember much.
[[His voice was steady, it was just fact, nothing to be upset about any longer for him. Kind of.]]
Hana was just a normal, typical girl. Family. Younger brother. A normal childhood outside the door and caught with an abusive father behind the walls that no one stood up to. You don't bite the hand that feeds you.
[[Another soft moment of quiet, he knows she'll listen. The sounds of his fingers lifting to scratch at his neck, are light, close to the device as they are.]]
Just like you, she had a head on her about being a hero— [[To which he added a little softer.]] with her younger brother. Hero siblings.
[[Without much a beat, Shigaraki continued, deciding to drop the point of it.]]
You remind me of her sometimes. Saying or doing things that attempt to make someone feel better. I don't believe you when you say you'd start a war just because Toga stood in thirty feet of you. That's childish and stupid. Hana wouldn't have and neither would you. Heroes don't do that.
Edited (I'm dumb lol) 2020-11-18 04:29 (UTC)
cuts myself on the broken pieces of my heart and dies
[Ochako really is an idiot, in the eyes of some - but she's also very much a child as well. She doesn't have the wisdom or the experience necessary to make perfect, even rational decisions sometimes. She tries, she certainly does try, but in the end, her emotions tend to get the better of her. Whether that's her kind heart, or her usually bottled temper, Ochako is governed mostly by her heart. She feels for people - it's why she became a hero in the first place. She felt the burden her mother and father carried, and wanted to lift it away. She felt the weight of loss, of grief, of guilt when she held a dying man in her arms, and vowed to save every life she could henceforth.
And now, as she listens quietly for the words of what should be a sworn enemy, she feels...anxious. Hana and Mon - she'll make sure to remember those names. A brother. Her head lifts up a little, pieces fitting together one by one, with every new sentence.
An abusive father. Her expression twists painfully. The misty look her eyes held changes, and it's no longer shocked joy, but a cold sadness that holds those tears now. Heroes...hero siblings. He wanted to be a hero in the past, with his sister. His sister who was gone now. What happened? Should she ask? Does she really want to know? Did their father do something? To her? To him? He must have... Something must have happened to push Shigaraki to become...
This. Not after all he's telling her now. Ochako watches a tear slatter on the screen of her phone, and then another, and another. She's quiet a long moment, silence broken only by her tiny gasps.]
I--... [What does she even say to that? Sorry seems paper thin. Shigaraki doesn't want her throwaway apology. Telling him he's right is just the same. Empty. Pointless. Unwanted.] I-I...I have t-to do...b-b-better.
[[There were so many details that he left out and one day is she was brave enough to ask, or the situation provoked it... she would learn. He had told his story confidently in front of his family--The League. He had told her before, he didn't want her dead. He meant it. He wanted to make the world bow and break. If she was the best of them, he could deal with their worst. It would make victory all that much more bitter and sweet.
Either way what he hadn't thought of was that hearing something like this would make her fall into a fit of tears. She was crying and he didnt know what to do with that.]]
Start by not crying. All this happened a long time ago, but I will expect you to keep your promise and get as strong as you can. That includes not dying in Bakugo's plan. Go with him, fine, I cant stop you. Just dont be a corpse.Understood?
[She sniffs, and nods, even though he can't see. Ochako knows Shigaraki doesn't like it when she cries, so she tried to keep it quiet, but it still hurts...to know that he grew up in a place like that. That he had a sister - had a sister - and that he wanted to be a hero with her. Had aspirations to be a hero. It hurts to know that Ochako reminds him of her. She never had a sibling, being an only child herself, but she wonders what it could be like...sometimes.
Rubbing her face, Ochako steadies her voice as best she can, and goes to sink into her bed, and pull one of her stuffed toys close to her for some comfort.]
Mhm, I understand. I...I-I won't cry...and I won't die. Even if it's not Bakugou's plan, or...or whatever. A patrol, whatever else this stupid place does - I won't die. But-- [Ochako takes a deep breath, and steadies her voice because, it's important.] ...You can't either. You can't die.
[[The sniffle is enough for him to get that she is trying, he really didn't know what to do when females were crying and he had no reason to just hang up. Or didn't want to hang up. Respectfully, he waited.
Women of any age were complicated and he didn't know how to deal with ones that weren't psychotic and at least listened to him in some way. He didn't remember a time in his recent history that Toga had cried. Maybe. He should really have paid more attention. Maybe.
Listening on once she had herself a moment or two, Shigaraki's eyebrows pulled together. He had to replay what she said in his head a couple times. Did she just throw his 'I don't want you dead' in his face, only much more obviously?]]
You're right.
[[It wasn't resignation, just some good ol' fashioned:]]
I can't die, there's no one good enough here to kill me. Even from my own ...
[[He made a noise, not sure what to call them and settled on:]]
The rest of the League.
[[Inflection and all. He had no clue what they were word wise, he just knew how he felt and wouldn't ever let on. They were another side to him and something he would bitterly defend. But here he was talking to someone as easily as this who he shouldn't be, or shouldn't want to. Even if he had given Twice more than permission to do whatever he wanted, his self-double standard rang through.]]
I'll be fine. It's late. Go to sleep, you seem to think that school is important.
[She certainly did, and meant it. Ochako really and truly doesn't want Shigaraki dead. He asked her if she could kill him when they first talked, and while she's still not sure if she could do that, she knows that in battle...it may come down to that. At the very least, that's something Ochako knows in inevitable, something she can at least prepare for mentally and emotionally.
What she can't prepare for is the possibility of anything happening to Shigaraki outside of a fight with herself or any one of her friends and teachers. He says he can't die, and she smiles wryly down at her phone because...yeah, Shigaraki is strong, he's incredibly strong, but he's not invincible, nor is he immortal. Anything could happen in this stupid place, and while Ochako's not going to argue over the phone with him over that, it's something Ochako is aware of. Something nagging at the back of her mind.
Anything could happen. Even something that Shigaraki, with his boastful pride and power couldn't get out of, and imsgining that, thinking about it... No. No need to work herself up over something that could or couldn't happen.]
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we need to get more information abt the porter and what is rly is and how it functions.
i only rly said that if he needs me for anything to call on me...and knowing him, he'll try to shoulder the burden all on his own like an imbecile.
but i won't throw myself, or him, into a situation that could get us killed, and i know kat
i know bakugou-kun won't allow me to get hurt either.
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Take it from someone who knows, no one can protect anyone. You can try and you can fail while trying to protect someone, or you can do or die and win.
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ok that i do agree with, but bakugou won't wait. he's impatient and reckless...i'm sure even YOU know that.
after everything he's been thru, i'm sure he's getting desperate too...and scared. he won't admit it, but i know him.
and tho u may disagree, shigaraki-san, i WILL keep katsuki safe. and everyone else.
i thank u for ur concern...i do. but u already know what side i'd choose.
if it puts ur mind at ease, i will try to talk him down as much as possible, or at least formulate some sort of ACTUAL plan.
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Choose whatever you want. I'm not your dad. If he's already scared, he's already a liability. If you're trying to protect everyone, you'll be dead and protecting no one. It's not concern it's reality and that's why I'm here.
You need a plan and I've done this before. I gave him a list of what I need. If you deviate from the plan I'll make sure to arrest you both myself and we'll take care of it.
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Ochako immediately bristles though, both at the insults thrown at her friend, and the jab at her pride. Yeah, maybe he's right - she can't save everyone, but she'd be damned if she doesn't try.
Her cute chat speech is gone, an actual frown on her face now as she plucks at the letters on her phone.]
You're free to think that, Shigaraki-san, but I'm going to disagree with you. Maybe not everyone, but I WILL save people, especially those I'm closest to. I'm still a hero, and that's been my goal for a while now. So, don't tell me what I can and can't do. I'll only try harder to prove you wrong.
[Isn't that what he wanted? For her to be better? Stronger? Well, here's her resolve to do just that.]
What's your plan? If you've already spoken with Bakugou and he disagreed, I'm sure there's a reason why...but I'll at least listen.
[Like she always does. Shigaraki is owed that much, but there's no guarantee even she'll agree with his plans either.]
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My plan? It's to win. He doesn't want to do it my way and so since I contacted him to end this constant, boring fighting, I'm letting him get me the resources I need. If he can't, he knows I'll do it my way and on my own. That's how I help, that's the only way I help otherwise, we'll take care of it and actually get it done.
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Right...wrong question. How do you intend to "win", Shigaraki-san? Because I'm pretty sure "your way" may be something not even I can agree with...no offense. But, if you're really willing to work together with us, then maybe we can strike some sort of compromise.
Or at least I can, and then try to beat some sense into Bakugou later.
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I didn't message you to get you more deeply involved, I messaged you as a courtesy. Do what you want, when you want, with whoever you want.
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Whatever happens, happens. I can't control it, neither can you. I said I'd talk to Bakugou and see if anything else can be done - a real plan - but that's all I can do. If this is ALL you wanted to tell me...
[Ochako's eyes narrow at her phone, unseen, but she stares icily at the screen. If he wants to engage in a particular topic of conversation now, or later, regarding the newest arrival...she'll indulge any time.]
Otherwise, good night.
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Were you not aware she arrived, Shigaraki-san?
[Oh, she doubts that. The venue was relatively large, yes, but there was no way he wouldn't know. Shigaraki is too observant. And while she respects him, and well and truly enjoyed the time she spent with him there - it was actually a lot of fun, to spend time as two individuals without any titles or opposing sides and biases - this cannot be ignored.]
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[Not answering the first part, it's to be expected, and Ochako's not about to play with the "details" of their agreement - it's already shaky at best - but color her curious. What would he do? She honestly isn't so sure anymore.]
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I'm guessing she didn't do anything to hurt you. She likes you, you know.
[[That was a question without a question mark in it. She didn't tell him exactly and he needed to know.]]
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But I'll be honest, Shigaraki-san, for as much as she "likes" me...I really can't stand that girl. And I don't mean to be rude, but it's the truth. So many things about her make me so upset, so angry, that I can't think straight. I ACT before I think and it's scary. I don't want to be the reason we have to fight one another sooner rather than later, so...
I wanted to tell you that.
[It's not a threat, and not even a warning, just Ochako being honest about how she feels. Because she actually likes being able to talk to Shigaraki like he's a person. She really and truly enjoys spending time with him when she doesn't have to worry about Heroes vs. Villains. When she can just be Uraraka Ochako - a 16 year old high school student.
But it's not always easy to not start a fight when someone keeps egging you on. Even absentmindedly.]
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I don't mean to be rude is the same as 'I'm not racist, but'. It means you're about to say something you think is rude. All of us aren't any different, Ochako-san. We're all the same person with different starts. Toga is someone I will defend like you would defend Bakugo who did actual damage to someone, just because I was a villain. Am a villain.
I don't want paper trails. Call me.
[Voice > Audio - STILL HELLA LOCKED, FOOLS]
Which is why, after doing as instructed and dialing Shigaraki, she pretty much opens right with--]
I'm sorry, you're right. I misspoke.
Voice; LOCKED AF
I am right, but if you feel that way then don't apologize for it.
[[What is 'hello'? It's this.]]
I think out of all the heroes you actually have a chance at making a difference. Don't let that get to your head, you still do idiotic things. Asking you if you know why I'm saying this isn't going to get anywhere. Do you remember the little girl? The one I pointed out?
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'Don't let it get to your head' he says, but Ochako's already smiling at nothing, her features soft and eyes a little misty. How strange, that. Hearing a villain say she has a chance at making a difference feels like the biggest compliment she could get. Why?]
Mm... [Give her a second, Ochako is thinking, but also trying to right herself again after that shock.] Little gi--you mean the one I saw when we first talked? The one with the dog?
You didn't ask for a novel but you got one. Villain Monologue and of course locked.
He meant what he said, she was an idiot sometimes, but he wasn't stupid either. Just like Bakugo he could see that she had potential.]]
That's her— them. She was Hana, Mon was the dog. I don't expect you to remember much.
[[His voice was steady, it was just fact, nothing to be upset about any longer for him. Kind of.]]
Hana was just a normal, typical girl. Family. Younger brother. A normal childhood outside the door and caught with an abusive father behind the walls that no one stood up to. You don't bite the hand that feeds you.
[[Another soft moment of quiet, he knows she'll listen. The sounds of his fingers lifting to scratch at his neck, are light, close to the device as they are.]]
Just like you, she had a head on her about being a hero— [[To which he added a little softer.]] with her younger brother. Hero siblings.
[[Without much a beat, Shigaraki continued, deciding to drop the point of it.]]
You remind me of her sometimes. Saying or doing things that attempt to make someone feel better. I don't believe you when you say you'd start a war just because Toga stood in thirty feet of you. That's childish and stupid. Hana wouldn't have and neither would you. Heroes don't do that.
cuts myself on the broken pieces of my heart and dies
And now, as she listens quietly for the words of what should be a sworn enemy, she feels...anxious. Hana and Mon - she'll make sure to remember those names. A brother. Her head lifts up a little, pieces fitting together one by one, with every new sentence.
An abusive father. Her expression twists painfully. The misty look her eyes held changes, and it's no longer shocked joy, but a cold sadness that holds those tears now. Heroes...hero siblings. He wanted to be a hero in the past, with his sister. His sister who was gone now. What happened? Should she ask? Does she really want to know? Did their father do something? To her? To him? He must have... Something must have happened to push Shigaraki to become...
This. Not after all he's telling her now. Ochako watches a tear slatter on the screen of her phone, and then another, and another. She's quiet a long moment, silence broken only by her tiny gasps.]
I--... [What does she even say to that? Sorry seems paper thin. Shigaraki doesn't want her throwaway apology. Telling him he's right is just the same. Empty. Pointless. Unwanted.] I-I...I have t-to do...b-b-better.
I w-will....do better...
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Either way what he hadn't thought of was that hearing something like this would make her fall into a fit of tears. She was crying and he didnt know what to do with that.]]
Start by not crying. All this happened a long time ago, but I will expect you to keep your promise and get as strong as you can. That includes not dying in Bakugo's plan. Go with him, fine, I cant stop you. Just dont be a corpse.Understood?
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Rubbing her face, Ochako steadies her voice as best she can, and goes to sink into her bed, and pull one of her stuffed toys close to her for some comfort.]
Mhm, I understand. I...I-I won't cry...and I won't die. Even if it's not Bakugou's plan, or...or whatever. A patrol, whatever else this stupid place does - I won't die. But-- [Ochako takes a deep breath, and steadies her voice because, it's important.] ...You can't either. You can't die.
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Women of any age were complicated and he didn't know how to deal with ones that weren't psychotic and at least listened to him in some way. He didn't remember a time in his recent history that Toga had cried. Maybe. He should really have paid more attention. Maybe.
Listening on once she had herself a moment or two, Shigaraki's eyebrows pulled together. He had to replay what she said in his head a couple times. Did she just throw his 'I don't want you dead' in his face, only much more obviously?]]
You're right.
[[It wasn't resignation, just some good ol' fashioned:]]
I can't die, there's no one good enough here to kill me. Even from my own ...
[[He made a noise, not sure what to call them and settled on:]]
The rest of the League.
[[Inflection and all. He had no clue what they were word wise, he just knew how he felt and wouldn't ever let on. They were another side to him and something he would bitterly defend. But here he was talking to someone as easily as this who he shouldn't be, or shouldn't want to. Even if he had given Twice more than permission to do whatever he wanted, his self-double standard rang through.]]
I'll be fine. It's late. Go to sleep, you seem to think that school is important.
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What she can't prepare for is the possibility of anything happening to Shigaraki outside of a fight with herself or any one of her friends and teachers. He says he can't die, and she smiles wryly down at her phone because...yeah, Shigaraki is strong, he's incredibly strong, but he's not invincible, nor is he immortal. Anything could happen in this stupid place, and while Ochako's not going to argue over the phone with him over that, it's something Ochako is aware of. Something nagging at the back of her mind.
Anything could happen. Even something that Shigaraki, with his boastful pride and power couldn't get out of, and imsgining that, thinking about it... No. No need to work herself up over something that could or couldn't happen.]
...Yeah. Okay. Goodnight, Shigaraki.
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